A guilt trip for visiting the Doctor

Admittedly I have taken Jack to the Doctors about 4 times since he was born some 7.5mths ago.  I might be a new mum without a PhD but I’m certainly no time waster.

So, the guilt trip starts with the Receptionist.  I have to pluck up the courage to call my Doctors Surgery these days.  Yesterday I called to make an appointment as Jack had been feverish and run down all week, the Receptionist asked, ‘Do you need to see the Doctor because of a medical issue?’.  Seriously, was she for real?  Nope, I wanted to discuss my thoughts on new décor for my house.  I have had nothing but trouble with her previously.

Once, you’ve managed to satisfy the Receptionist and her ego that you do actually need to see a Doctor, trying to get an actual appointment is a joke.  I have NEVER been able to get a timed appointment, they only ever have Open Access available where you have to sit in the surgery amongst all the other poorly patients for a lengthy time with a baby.  It’s quite a treat when your baby is crying and everyone gives you evils as a result.

I made a complaint previously, having waited an hour with Jack only to find 3 Doctors chatting in a corridor with their brews.  I know that they are all due a break, but seriously, talk about frustrating when there is a queue of patients waiting to be seen.

Then there is the brief and pointless visit with the Doctor itself.  We always manage to get the same Doctor with Jack, perhaps he is a baby specialist but boy, is he hard work.  I may as well not bother.  He belittles me every time and makes me feel like we’re not worthy of his time.  His tone of voice is really quite brash and he has you out of there in a hurry and none-the-wiser.

Now I am no busy-body, worrying mum who panics at the first sign of trouble but I am a mum who knows her child better than anyone else so would like to think the Doctor could spare me his crap.

Should I be made to feel guilty for being worried about my son?  Should I put my boy at risk because I don’t want to waste the Doctor’s time?  To hell with that.

Below is a photo of Jack’s first visit to the Doctor at a week old – quite right too son.

Lisa x

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34 Comments

  • Reply
    Steph202015
    November 5, 2015 at 4:47 pm

    I know how you feel, we had the worst winter last year as my babies seem to be ill for the most of it. They had extremely high temps, ear infections, strange rashes which looked like chicken pox and sickness bugs. And i hated ringing/going to the doctors as they would always make me feel like I was overreacting and wasting their time. We even had to ring 111 a few times because we were so worried, and they advised us to go to the hospital. We then got a phone call from the doctors asking us to come down to the surgery to talk about why we needed to visit the hospital more than three times in the year. You really just can’t win. I hope your little one gets better soon and sold the doctors if your worried you know best. xx

  • Reply
    arthurwears
    October 4, 2015 at 1:10 pm

    I read a book called keep calm the new mum’s manual and it is written by a Dr.

    In there she talks about when she was training a professor said to her class “what is usually the first sign that a child is unwell?”

    “The first sign is if their mother is worried about them. If a mother ever comes in and tells you her baby is not right you listen whatever the circumstances”

    If only all (especially yours) Drs were given this advice!

    • Reply
      theloveofacaptain
      October 5, 2015 at 10:42 pm

      Hoorah for that professor! He was so right. No one knows their children better than a mum or dad so when a baby is out or character, docs should take notice! Thanks for that 🙂 xx

  • Reply
    Kayla
    September 28, 2015 at 8:11 pm

    That would be frustrating! I can’t even imagine that. Are you from a small town then and unable to find other doctors? I had my two kids in small towns so I understand that sometimes you just don’t have many options. I hope something works out for you soon though. There’s no excuse for that treatment, especially if you’re genuinely interested in your child’s well-being.

    • Reply
      theloveofacaptain
      October 1, 2015 at 1:12 pm

      We live in a big town but its just frustrating. You shouldn’t be made to feel like that at all. Shall need to look elsewhere I think! thanks for popping by xx

  • Reply
    Caro | The Twinkles Mama
    September 12, 2015 at 10:34 am

    We had an *awful* surgery in the place we used to live but the GPs surgery in the village we’re in now is wonderful. The receptionists are knowledgeable and kind and the doctors are brilliant and caring. Finding a good surgery is like gold-dust isn’t it? I’m SO thankful for them. Thanks so much for linking up with us #TwinklyTuesday

    Caro | http://www.thetwinklediaries.co.uk

    • Reply
      theloveofacaptain
      September 15, 2015 at 8:03 am

      Definitely! I’m going to need to switch I think, they don’t fill me with much confidence. Thanks for visiting our post xx

  • Reply
    confessionsofanaggingmother
    September 10, 2015 at 5:34 pm

    I understand your frustrations! It is a nightmare to get an appointment with our doctor and it always is a mission to finally speak to someone cos the phones are soooo busy! Don’t ever feel like you are wasting their time, it is what they are there for lovely. I hope all is ok 🙂

    Gemma danger

    • Reply
      theloveofacaptain
      September 11, 2015 at 12:41 pm

      Very true Gemma – if they didn’t have patients then they’d be out of a job. All good this end hun, you ok? xx

  • Reply
    acornishmum
    September 9, 2015 at 9:22 am

    There are some amazing doctors out there but sadly I always seem to get nightmare ones at the gps. At the end of the day though if you’re ever worried don’t take no for an answer or let them fob you off as they aren’t infallible and they may be wrong even if they don’t want to admit it!
    Stevie danger thanks for linking up to #Picknmix lovely

    • Reply
      theloveofacaptain
      September 9, 2015 at 2:44 pm

      Im thinking about changing docs soon, my surgery is really bad and id rather see a Doc who cares xx

  • Reply
    awesomeausterity
    September 9, 2015 at 6:07 am

    This is so familiar to me. It can be three weeks for an appointment at our surgery – I’d take the open access over that but I appreciate waiting with a 5 yr old is easier than with a new baby. Despite the fact that I am a doctor I find receptionists hard work- I never tell them what I do- not sure if it would help the situation!

    • Reply
      theloveofacaptain
      September 9, 2015 at 2:47 pm

      3weeks!! that’s shocking, im surprised they have any patients at all. Thanks for visiting our post and for following us. Have just followed you back 🙂 xx

      • Reply
        awesomeausterity
        September 10, 2015 at 6:07 am

        Thank you- I’ve been meaning to follow for a while 🙂

  • Reply
    Mess stress and fancy dress
    September 8, 2015 at 7:41 pm

    I bet he told you it was an unidentified virus! I’d look into changing surgery. Go on their website to find out how to complain as well. I think we’ve all been there though, and it’s really frustrating to feel like that about your own child’s health. Another good read lovely! Xx

    • Reply
      theloveofacaptain
      September 9, 2015 at 2:48 pm

      Cheers Helen 🙂 Yeh have been thinking about changing Dor actually. Its not on that they undermine our childs health at all xx

  • Reply
    Lisa
    September 8, 2015 at 4:34 pm

    Definitely don’t feel guilty about going to the doctors I really do think mummy knows her baby best. When Ben was little he had really bad reflux and we were always there. The paediatrician would say he looked happy enough and I’d push for a chest X-Ray. In total he had 5 chest X-Ray’s before he was 2 and each showed a massive infection that they gave IV antibiotics for, glad I was a pushy mum!

    • Reply
      theloveofacaptain
      September 9, 2015 at 2:50 pm

      Its shocking isn’t it. How dare they mess with our childs health! Their self pride should make them want to help everyone that walks through the door rather than fob them off 🙂 danger

  • Reply
    Faye
    September 8, 2015 at 10:31 am

    Grrr the receptionist! I hate to tar all with one opinionated brush (which is that they are rude, nosey and judgemental) but I have never had a positive experience with one yet! The doctor that we saw when T was 2 weeks old however was amazing, very supportive indeed (although clearly had no idea how to handle a tiny baby but he tried, plus reassured me when I profusely apologised in case I was time wasting by being over paranoid as the receptionist had made me feel!)
    Great read! Faye x

    #twinklytuesday

    • Reply
      theloveofacaptain
      September 9, 2015 at 2:51 pm

      Thank you Faye! That’s how all Docs should be. I don’t know where Receptionists get off but they have some power trip on the go 🙁 xx

  • Reply
    Kat @ Eat.Love.Live
    September 8, 2015 at 10:08 am

    It’s terrible that you are made to feel that way. He’s your child, you know him and if something’s not right it’s better to be over cautious. Our poor babies can’t tell us what’s wrong so we have to rely on our judgment. My doctors surgery is terrible too. You can only get an appointment if you book a week or two in advance otherwise you have to go to the emergency clinic where you sit in that waiting room amongst poorly people. Boy oh boy did I complain about that when I had an unimmunised 2 week old, mastitis and desperate need for antibiotics. Safe to say they bent the rules #twinklytuesday x

    • Reply
      theloveofacaptain
      September 9, 2015 at 2:53 pm

      Cheeky gits they are! Whats the point in getting an apt in 2weeks time? Im sure they say that to put us off getting one. So frustrating. xx

  • Reply
    kylesyco
    September 8, 2015 at 9:47 am

    I always feel like this going to the doctor too. The worst part is for every person who decides to suck it up and go anyway, there’s probably another person suffering at home with a sick baby because they’ve been made to feel too embarrassed to make the call. Even if all you end up getting is reassurance, sometimes that’s all you need. Without the side of condescension. Great post! #twinklytuesday

    • Reply
      theloveofacaptain
      September 9, 2015 at 2:55 pm

      You are so right, ive needed an apt for myself a few times and haven’t even bothered calling them as I know i’ll be fobbed off. I agree with you 100% xx

  • Reply
    Gemma H
    September 8, 2015 at 8:34 am

    I feel your pain on the receptionists thing, it can be so difficult getting appointments! I think motherhood really toughens us up though as when it’s your little one’s health in question you can brush things off more easily! #TwinklyTuesday

    • Reply
      theloveofacaptain
      September 9, 2015 at 2:56 pm

      Yeh definitely, i’ve started to be a bit sharper these days when speaking with them. Don’t think they like it but I couldnt give a hoot. xx

  • Reply
    Elaine Livingstone
    September 7, 2015 at 10:15 pm

    been there, done that. My second born was an ill baby who was at the Dr 3,4,5 times a week for the first 4 weeks of her life,to be told every time nothing wrong you are paranoid, and only when I had reached the end of my tether one Saturday evening and really wanted to shut her up by putting a pillow over her face ( yes yes I know terrible) as she had not stopped crying for days.
    He came out and again said there was nothing wrong, so I said I didnt care, take her home to the wife, phone the social work and get her fostered I cannot take any more he agreed to admit her overnight. Turns out I was right and he was wrong and hospital told us she would have died overnight without medical intervention as she was that ill. Never did get an apology

    • Reply
      theloveofacaptain
      September 9, 2015 at 2:58 pm

      Holy flip! how scary is that?! See we do know our own children, how dare they make us think otherwise. It’s already tough enough with a new baby. Its disgraceful. Thank god your little one is okay, no thanks to the doctor danger

  • Reply
    Mummy in Training (@mrskxxxx)
    September 5, 2015 at 10:03 am

    I have had exactly the same experiences but it isn’t worth the risk not getting them checked is it?! #PickNMix xx

  • Reply
    Random Musings
    September 5, 2015 at 1:22 am

    I can’t stand the power trip receptionist – yes someone gave you the power to answer the phone, now get over it! As for being made to feel like this from your dr, I would seriously think about changing. At the end of the day, if you are worried, you have a right to be seen and treated with respect. A good dr would rather see 10 healthy babies than 1 who’s mum was too scared to come earlier and is now very ill! #effitfriday
    Debbie

    • Reply
      theloveofacaptain
      September 6, 2015 at 11:12 pm

      Hi Debbie, thanks for visiting our post – You are right, my boy comes first end of story, the Doctor shall just have to get over himself! xx

  • Reply
    Beau is Blue (@beauisblue)
    September 4, 2015 at 9:27 pm

    Oh our doctors is exactly the same. I remember when i was pregnant and called to book an app and was told to wait until the following week for the app. I told her i was pregnant aand couldnt wait – appointment within the hour…!!! Such a lovely read! Suz x Beauisblue.com

    • Reply
      theloveofacaptain
      September 6, 2015 at 11:15 pm

      Hey, thanks for visiting our post. They really are hard work aren’t they! My sister-in-law got told by my same doctor that it was normal for babies to routinely stop breathing – WTF! Turns out he was having mini-seizures in the night and had to have a monitor for a year. He is under a specialist now. What a joke xx

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